Baby i'm contented right now because i have you.
I got all your trust and all ur faith.

One day, your leaving the sentinal.
I will take care of you, like how much you take care of me all this while.
No, i mean. Even if u don't provide those financial assistance to me.
I will provide urs.
Other than cash, i gave you whatever i could.
Those could never be replaced by cash, or swap with other girls.
Theres only you in my heart. And i know this isn't the first time i'm saying. Hehe

Anyway..
I hate being in debts.
Those fuck debts i owe is just punishment for being too naive.
Once i clear it.
Life is gonna be easier.
My sis will help me with life.
I know she will, she won't bear to see me in pain.
I'm trying to clear my debts as much as i could, as fast as i can.
Actually i did calculations. Every month i spend about 400 bucks. Thats quite less for me. I can actually save about 200 bucks every month.
And i'm actually clearing my debts over 200 bucks each month.

I had plans in my future.
I will make my mark.
I will work hard.
I will not let you down.
I promised to take care of you.
Believe in me :>

Baby i love you.

TODAY!

Well.
Today is the last day of my camp.
Then i got released at about 3pm.
Called b.
Pick up.
Ask her come meet me now.
Well..
Waited 1 hour 40mins outside camp.

Baby.
Actually im quite angry in the start.
But then.
Hehe. I know u dislike cold war.
You had ur reasons for being late & i put on a black face once you reach.
So.
Baby im sorry okay.
:>
But can u tell me next time. So that i wont be standing there like my duty LOL.
Baby baby i love you.
tomorrow we shall have our 1st time taking MRT together.
:D im excited... :x LOL

Slightly...disappointed?

I guess for once, I know how it feels like to let you wait for me all the time.
I'm sorry.
I don't blame you, or more to say.. I can't blame you at all because you held on to your consciousness all night to play DotA with me. C:
Sweet dreams to you, you'll probably be sleeping in camp.
Good night, my sexy love!

B.

RE: Thank you for everything

Looking at your post.
I felt that i should have done a better post. Sorry.
Looking at our past.
I felt that things will get better, sooner or later. Dun worry :>
Looking at how much i done like what you said in ur post.
I felt that its all worth it.
Looking at all the post u wrote for me, about me.
I realize that i got no more worries, troubles.

Baby, Its only 2 months.
I know its short.
But do you know that i feel like i've known you for a very long time.
We've so so much in common.
The way we speak.
The way we thinks.
We've done so much things together.
Those memories will be kept between my heart and mind.
I will not forget anything we've done together.

I remember the times, you're asking me to give up.
Whereby most of the time i know i did nothing wrong.
But still i keep apologizing to you.
The reason is simple, i can't afford to lose you.
Days without you, are simply torturing.
I've said this before.
Even if you were to tell me to give up again.
I will not. I will never give up one you.

Hey baby, im really happy about the times when u're with me.
whether home or outside.
I enjoyed every moment.
Just a simple lunch at the coffeeshop with you can also brighten my day.

You are the one, that makes me smile so much, so natural.
You are the one, that teach me how to treasure a person, a girl-friend.
You are the one, always trying to make me become a good guy (That doesnt bm and scolds around when dota-ing)
You are the one, who bought cigs for me when i short of cash. ( without me telling )
You are the one, that i will give in.( no matter whose fault is it)
You are the ONLY one, that i love.
Rest assure.





Baby, breaking my record isn't big deal.
Breaking your record is.
Lets do it. (:
Have faith in me.
I ♥ you ( No more shortcuts)

Thank you for everything

Hi baby baby. Today's our virgin day! It's how I name the first day since our second month together. Oh well, I'm a little better than you. I made my first draft in my mind while listening to the song on your iTouch. I'm like, 'er', 'uh', 'ummm...', you know me. :p

First off, thank you for everything. Yeah I know it's on the title! Heehee. But it doesn't matter right now, deshou?

I've had many first-timers with you. And surprisingly awkward, I enjoyed it. Thank you for trying to break through the embarrassment I keep shielding myself with. Really, thank you. You made me realize that, most of the material stuffs don't matter at all as long as we're together. Be it for now, I'll cherish this moment and etch every other moments with have -- in my memoir forever.

Maybe, I just suck at expressing sometimes. I get mad, unreasonable, childish and oftenly, I react bad to getting teased by you. I shy away. I push you away. I tickle you. I hit you. All for basically no reasons. And sometimes it's just because it's fun and you look cute trying to get me to stop. Your smile has never once failed to brighten up my day.

And then I start to think about the past, where I've never bothered about your existence. You were just a friend's friend of mine. Then you became san--, my net idol. I started to notice you more. I started to join in your DotA games. Know your name. Know your background. Know your past. Then I know your friends. Everything links up to something. Coincidentally, one day, we were at the same Kbox. And you were singing. That's something new, I never knew that about you. If the legends say, 'love at first sight', I probably knew what was falling in love with your amazing voice. We started texting. Doing little things on the net together. MSN, Webcam and DotA. I knew you more, bit by bit. That was when I knew, you were just darn funny and amazingly interesting. Though that one period was when I was at the most depressed point of my life. But hey, you were there to laugh with me. Not laugh at me.

I knew you liked me at a certain time. But I wasn't so sure if it was just crush or simple infatuation. So I started to ask you to give up. You were so determined that I was astonished for the first time in my life -- at one man's determination and perseverance. C:

Soon, the rumors came. The hating started. I was new to this feeling. Hesitation. It's not just hesitating between choosing two brands of chocolate or what to eat for dinner. I had to make a choice between you or work. Without you, I can still work. But somewhere in there, remember Lu-chan? She said you were one special thing, that I might never want to live without. And that's what's motivating me to hold on till now. You've never once stopped to give me security, continuously letting me know that you're still there and holding on. Not letting go. Thank you. I'll never let go of you too unless you ask me to. I promise.

Everything we've gone through played a part. Some conditions. Compromises and promises. Give and take. What else. But this love just never gets tiring. I'm still working hard on it. I'll make myself your girlfriend officially one day. I know it hurts, the way it sounds. I'm not okay with letting you go through all these, you don't deserve what they say at all, you're far too nice. Far too good. But I just can't and I'll never want to give up on that one man that made me...a better person.

I love you.

For the one man I've once loved and love lost forever, cheers.
For the one man I've found, love and will cherish.. Till the day your heart is no longer mine. I'll leave my everything with you. You name it, my mind, my heart and my soul.

P.S You looked really sexy back there in the shower.
P.P.S I dropped your iTouch once, and I even took off its cover. Like oooooops?
P.P.P.S I love you.
P.P.P.P.S You're mean for reading this from the autosaved draft. :C MEANIE.

B.

Its our 2nd month :>

Baby you are asleep now :> Hehe.
Thanks for today. I appreciate everything u did for me today.
Really. Things u've never done in the past..
Haha.

Well.Lets save alot alot money okay? :D
I had no idea wad to post.
Words cant describe my love for you.
The previous post u posted is damn sweet .
Hah.
I guess only we know wad it means.
Its our own world :>
I keep reading the post over and over again.
That brightens my day.
Hehehehe.

I love you Bella. I hope we are happier than now in the future.Though im alrdy contented in our present now :>

Happy 2nd monthsary
I love you!

Baby baby

I know I haven't been good enough, but rest assured. I will do better.
.
.
.

.
.
.
I'll get to see you later! Like in 1~3 hours' time! C:

Let's go meet my brother. Get my cellphone line done so I can start texting you like 14/7 every week. Then we can go home and watch American Pie and fall asleep together...(most probably I'll be the only one sleeping...) I know you'll be waking up to play DotA. But that's okay! Definitely okay! I love you and I like DotA. Putting you and DotA together makes every game the best game. ♥

P.S You're so MOE, I think I might just become an addict. Like...
I'm actually a hardcore otaku who loves Wenbin more than having three meals in a day. And I only read books related to DotA. Also, I only visit gaming cafés. Of course, I also collect san-- figurines. I play DotA which features san-- and it turns me on so much...that I'll wear the guards polo tee and jump in joy.

I know you love me. C:
I'm gonna refill the fridge okay? Then give you a call. Sore jaa!

B.

I know that I may be a little too selfish at times.
So it's okay to go ahead and scold me for a little bit. :p

B.

Today, i book out at 2.45pm. Cause b say she will reach my camp at 2.45 .
Soso, I wait wait wait.
Wait for abt 30mins outside camp.. I got bored and i drew things on my bag.
While drawing , i realise that im actually smiling to myself.
Hehe.
Draw for about 10mins.
Then then. I realise its almost 3.45, which is 1 hour of waiting for her.
So i begin to pluck the tree bark's skin.
LOL.
I got really bored and i kicked the dry leaves on the ground.
YAY!
B arrived.
I'm not angry with you actually.
I'm trying to ACT angry. Hahaha.
But who cares. Hehe.
I dunno why, I cant bear to be angry with you.
I just love you so much, watching u sleep can also make me smile.
Hehe.

Hmms.
Reached home, bathed and went down to make another key for B.
This is the first time i made a key for my girlfriend.
Because B always complain i keep forgetting to bring my keys home :<
But be honored pls!
:B

Till night time..
B is angry with me.
Sorry..
But okay, after we talk things out.
Actually we just love each other too much.
So we expect everything to be perfect.
Ahhh.
I just feel bad.
I trust everything u say okay.
I wont even think of those silly thoughts again.
I promise u, i promise myself.
I trust u, & i trust myself to be able to do it.

About midnight, We watch new anime.
Quite cute one.
LOL. B dun skip the episodes hor.
I wan watch tgt with you :>
If not nobody will smile tgt with me.. I will find it meaningless.
Well , I mean i only wan u watch with me.
No other girls can take over ur place in my heart, in the real world.
:>

B's tired. Lying on bed.
I went cook something to eat.
& B didn't wake up!
I mean, she's just tired.
Well.. I can understand. Her job is just too tiring.. 12 hours..
As her boyfriend. I can only wish that she can take care of her body if i'm not around..
So b, like what i said in the morning. Today i will give u whole day to rest.
SLEEP AS MUCH AS U CAN. I WONT BLAME U :D
I WONT GET ANGRY! :D
I give u solo the bed kkkk.
Then i can dotaaaa :x

Dota with di edward and oevin for 2 games.
As usual. Playing with them i cant have high hopes of winning.
Both lost.
BUT!
As usual. I'm doing 1 man show. Having over kills and few deaths.
Hehe.

Then then. Meet up and slack at 166 for awhile.
Eat and drink.
I dint spend a single cent.

Came back home at 6+..
Gonna dota with them again.. Cya.

Aishiteru B :D

I am sorry, my love.

I'm always over sensitive.
I trust you, u know that.
But i know im behaving like a kid, having such thoughts.
For that, i apologize to you.
Sorry b..

Can you never ever lose your sense of humor? :p
Because, I love it.

B.

I made a wish today. Ukr.
Though I may make silly wishes all the time, I do hope that this particular one really does come true...

P.S I like the way you call me baby!
And I miss you badly. I hope Thursday comes soon!

B.

B, I wanna thank you.
I thank you for being there whenever i need you.
I thank you for your understanding.
I thank you for care , concern and continuous trust.
I thank you for so much of efforts to maintain our relationship.
I thank you for spending so much time to accompany me.
I thank you for those beautiful yet cute memories we got.

I love you! & i promise that my feelings and attitude towards you will only gets better and better. :>






RE:
I thank you for giving me one of the best thrills in life, risking your ass. (y)
I thank you for doing everything willingly everytime, just for bubble teas.
I thank you for trying so hard to make me smile, always.
I thank you for always saying what's on your mind, in your heart. I hate guessing.
I thank you for being appreciative, every time, without fail.
I thank you for teaching me UNO and then admit defeat to a beginner like me.
I thank you for understanding what it means to be under pressure. CPL > RSM.
I thank you for knowing that even though I'm not a romanticist, you still put up with my most unromantic nonsense.
I thank you for though taken for granted, you still smile.
I thank you for putting on the best and silliest expressions. Priceless.
I thank you for training dumbells to 40 even when I purposely miscount every time.
I thank you for thanking me and now I thank you for loving me.
Well, basically. I think we're nuts. We laugh too much which is actually a pretty good thing. And we fight too little which I think, is really weeeeeeeiiiiiiiiiiirrrrrrddddddddd. Not that I like to fight.
Well, last but not least..
I thank you for making the effort to do something even though you forgot about your keys TWICE.

You don't have to change anything. I'll always ♥ you. HEY, I seriously like you the way you are. A little too paranoid but seriously, I don't care! :D

B.

Hi. I know I shouldn't be here but seriously, who cares? HEHEHEHE. It's okay, whatever you do. You'll be forgiven. 我从不记隔夜愁。 Especially, with you. :>

I didn't know Kuromi irritates you so much at times. Maybe, I'm just plain selfish. But, I guess it's my responsibility to keep a kitty. Although sometimes, I'll just leave her to you. But I'll never realize that I'm only bringing you nothing...but more trouble. I, as her owner. Apologize to you, for always making you get scoldings.

You should've just woke me up instead of pulling on a black face. You know I'll never blame you for anything. I've been learning to put up with everything that's because of you. You give me strength and more than enough courage. But it's still my own goddamn fault that I've never ever been courageous enough to say...Hi Wenbin, I love you. :3

B.

Today. It was suppose to be a great day. Because you had 24 hours to acc me.
But im kinda, having bad mood now.
Frankly, I dunno wad will u think of it if i post this.
Im starting to dislike things around you.
I dislike it when kuromi jumps around disturbing us.
Scratching u and hurts u. Ya i know , its just a cat. Did u realise that u bring the cat everywhere we go? I wan to go out with you.
Seriously..
But fine. Since u like her so much, Im fine with it too.
Now that shes hiding under my sis's bed. Idk wad to do, Im going to get scolding again. For no reason.
I closed the door. My mum opens it. I brought her out, She opens the door and let the cat in again.
My sis dislike that cat.

Well then. Forget about the cat stuff.
I realise.
U only got my msg, I cant believe that the whole day im the only 1 msging you.
I can see that u deleted all the previous msg when u came to meet me..
You know i dislike.
But wad will i think?
Why do u have to do that if u aren't hiding anything from me.
hug hug. HUG? what hug?
I hate cursing around.
I hate swearing around.
I'm fuckin trying to control myself now.
If i am alone now i would curse till my lungs burst..

Well.. I'm alone, Ya i am alone, doing nothing, U came here to sleep, aren't you?
I dislike this. What makes u think that i would wake u up after 2 hours of rest?
Do i bear to do that?

WOAH! LET ME SAY!
THESE 2 DAYS IN CAMP WERE THE BEST DAYS IN CAMP EVER!
CAUSEEEEEEEEEEEEEE. :D:D:D SHES HERE FOR ME.
I LOVE YOU B!

wahahaha.
I love the spending the time with u!
I just love you more and more.
Just a moment u left me, i would feel uneasy.
So hope that u'are by my side .
:D

There are always problems and troubles in each and everyone of us.
& . I know u're stress.
I can see the way u behave.
You're trying to be happy , like before.
I looked into your eyes, you're troubled.
I know u have something that u feel like telling me.
But i will not ask you. I will not add on ur burden. If you feel like telling me, remember that i will always be ur listening ear, your human sandbag.
& no matter what, i trust you. I will not leave you..
Iloveyou.

Friday
Today i book out at 1.30
Then b take cab come find fetch me and go home tgt.
Hehe. As usual. Watch kanon together. Haha.
Makoto GONE :<
That ugu ugu girl :x

Well then.
Soon after not long. She fall aslp..
Aslp..
And i couldnt sleep cux i slept in the morning.
So i went and play DOTA!
play play play. 一转眼 almost 10pm. I tried waking B up BUT! she's sleeping like a 豚. true 豚.
I asked her. Hey wad u wanna eat. I dabao for u. Mac / kfc / pizza 随便你。
she uh.. nod nod. -.- shake shake..
So idc. I went down to our favourite coffeeshop and dabao her USUAL orders.
Hokkien mee and milo ice. :D

Then reach home i try waking her up. AGAIN!
finally shes awake.
1st thing she do, Go mozilla firefox and on kanon @@.
I expected it anyway. Haha.
Then she eat infront of the comp as i alrdy finished my food.

After that.
We chatting while watching
And kuromi is like jumping around.

Then then.
About 11pm+. I go play dota. B sit beside me and watch for the first 2 games.
We had fun toking cock LOL. True NONSENSE !

Soon enuff. About 2am.. That 豚 fall asleep again.. -.-
Idk wad shes make of.
I tried waking her up again..
Mission fail.. I fall asleep with her LOL.

Till morning . I realise im alone . B IS MISSING. Oh she's bathing.
Hah. I tot she left w/o me knowing :x
My eyes closed again.

When i opened my eyes again.
I saw her taking her stuff.
Oh no! She's leaving :<
"B i send u downstairs okay"
"No u continue sleep la, you so tired"
"orh okay, bye B"
"bye"

Sleep sleep sleep till about 3pm. Okay its 3.33pm. Cux i woke up and find my phone to sms her. She say its 3:33!
LOL.
Then then.
I go dotaaaa :D
Until now :x




I love the time being with you, (:

Well.

I know what am i.
Maybe i dun stands a important position in ur heart.
Maybe im just wadever u said i was.
Im still not giving up.
You stand a important position in my heart
You're everything to me.

I always know that asking those questions will lead to unhappiness.
It always spoiling our r/s . Well, maybe its not even a r/s . like u said.
Nobody knows about it.
Nobody knows that i existed.
Therefore i'm just a nobody.

You're always asking me to give up
It's alrdy the 3rd time.
I'm not giving up. even if u ask for the another 3 times. 30times or 300 times.
No matter what. I may be doing everything u asked me to do.
But i am not giving up if u asked me to..

Whenever u left me for work.
I felt so lonely again.
You're always there to accompany me when i book out.

Hey b.
I dunno how to describe it.
You are special , to me.
I really want to take care of you in future.
Yeah i have be disappointing you.
I'm a joke to you as time goes by.
There's so little conversation left between me and you.
I couldn't bear to scold u. Even if you did sth that i think is wrong.
Thats why im forever being the one saying sorry.
I'm always afraid that if our fight got worsten , you will leave me.

Sometimes idk why shld i be so persistent..
I felt that its worth it.

iloveyou..

What should i do?

Everytime i reach home. Whenever i sees you.
You will never ask me if im hungry.
First sentence from you is always about money.
seriously wtf am i?

You got fuckin 5 digit no. in ur fuckin bank account and u wanna ask me for money.
Hey, since 15 years old u never gave me a single cent before ok.
Its my sis that help me go through those fucked years.
Your always scolding me.
You dont care what i doing.
In ur eyes you only sees me as a game addict.
Yea im game addict. But thats past alrdy?
Ya im always making ur electricity bills rise up.
When i din even come home often?
What are you whining? seriously.

Im trying to be filial to you , you know?
Im doing my part as much as i could.
Your always seeing me as if im good for nothing.
People says that family is most important , they will help you.
I agree , to certain extend.

Trust me.
If 1 day im being accuse for doing some unlawful stuff.
She will not even bait me out.
She will even bother to ask me what happened.
She believe in her friends more than me and my sister.
What her friends told her , she believes.
Whenever we tried to talk to her.
We will always end up quarreling.

Just 5mins ago.
Your asking me for money again.
Hey u think im fuckin rich?
1month got 1k+
do u know how much financial problems i got?

NO , u dunno.
You just think that i MUST give u monthly allowance.
If not ur giving up this room and rent it to others.
You dun even bother where should i sleep.
A god damn 10+ years old sofa?

Hey i dun wan that ok.
If this is my home.
You should give me something i deserve?

I bought my own stuff
Think of it.
When is the last time you've bought something for me?
Except birthday cake?
You arent poor.
We know that.
If 1 day im having deep deep trouble
Will u take out those money and save me?
I bet no.

What u care is the ownership of this house.
Isn't thats the elders' problems.
Not me and my sis.
Why you love to vent ur anger on us whenever u said that dad force u to pay the money.

I said, 10th. When my pay day comes. I will return u.
You are rushing me for the money whenever u sees me?
Wtf?

Look about it.
Which furniture in our home changed over the 10 years?
They are all old.
OLD! and u din bother. Wad to do? Sis have to fork out own money.
To change the quality of this house.
You never even bother saying thanks.
Did we really owe u something in our previous life?


What now?
Now its 1.25am
Im missing somebody.
Talking about this somebody..
Shes still online, haha.

Should i go sleep?
Or continue waiting like i always do?
Well. let fate decide.

Whenever u are not with me, I feel so insecure. My brain will anyhow think again. It's not your fault I know. Why are there so many guys always sticking around you..? And they all look as if they are close to you. I don't wanna think until so ridiculous . Because of my fuck up mindset. I'm just like torturing myself .. You know I get jealous easily. Very sensitive .. I hate this . But well, I believe in you and I trust that u only love me.. U know what. Once u went to somebody's house and overnight. I'm afraid that u would go again without me knowing. I'm so afraid that u would. What to do? I'm just so narrow minded and I'm fckin selfish . I dun have a big heart. My small small heart, is given to you alrdy. I try to change. Days with you. Even just by looking at u while u sleep, I'm contented . I love the way u hug me, I can feel u. That isn't fake. Actually.. I dunno what I'm good at. Your always saying that I'm praising u as if ur so perfect. Well. Sometimes u made me feel that I'm more than the word " perfect " you're always sounding that whatever I did looks cute. In ur eyes, my stupid reactions can make u smile. My stupid jokes can make u laugh. Even my voice, you sound as if I can try interview be singer. Lol. How? U praise me alot. I bet u don't realize that. Imma tell u what. Even if u did nothing, you're still cute in my eyes . Even if u dun try to sa jiao at eme. I will do whatever u asked me to. Your wish is my command . I wanna Know more about you. That's all.