I wanna have a habit of writing dairy.

Yup. as the title says. The reason why i wanna write because i read a email while clearing my inbox.
guess what? the email was sent 4 years back by 1 of my ex. Her name is JacqTYL.

She is a good companion as well as a sweet girl. The reason why we broke up was entirely my fault.
I had ONS with others and i felt guilty and confess to her. She forgive me and we continued but in the end she told me she still couldn't forget what i had done behind her.

During that time i wasn't a good boyfriend either, not even serious about relationship. So when she suggest a break up, i didnt care either. I continued playing my dota and meet my friends. Not even affecting me a bit. Well sometimes i do think about her and emo-ed for a little while. But i got over it real fast.

Come to think of it my ex and my ex ex and my ex ex ex was really nice girls.
But i guess because of me i kinda changed my ex and my ex ex's lifes.
They somehow changed a little.

Recently was kinda shit as i'm still trying to forget my ex. Kept quiet and busying trying to keep myself busy.
Tmr is her bday and i'm still thinking to buy her a gift. But my friend told me not to. My friend even say that she thought i dont care about her. Well, honestly i care abt her, i think of her every night but i am not in a position to show my care. She has some other guys that massively showing her love and care. I guess she dont even need me. I've been trying to convince myself that if she doesn't care why should i? "This time round i'm not gonna follow my heart. I wanna follow my brain"

The fact is i kind of hurt her, and the reason why we broke up also because she lost trust in me. *Not because i did something behind her.

Come to think of it i really sucks as a boyfriend. :/

Enough of BGR shits.
I wanna do something big ! I wanna open a stall of my own and managing my staff. I do not know where to start and how to start so i'm gonna save moneyyyy and start planning. It had been my dream to open chain stores ( Stalls )
Well i'm not gonna do sales in the next few years ( though i'm good at it ) hehehe

Okay i'm kinda bored of writing. Will continue tomorrow i guess? :)